The Top 10 Reasons Why Barrie Sucks!

Here's an incredible Top 10 list of why Barrie sucks, from one of my friends here in Barrie. She's just as fed up with Barrie as I am, but for different reasons. It's made me realize even more that Barrie is not the place for me either. She's given me permission to use this list, but I've opted to protect her and her husband's identity.

Enjoy!


Hi Peter,

I just read your blog and I love it! You've said most of how I feel about this wretched place. I heard you might be leaving Barrie and I envy you. D***** and I are still in the planning stages of our get away, which will probably take us to Toronto.

Now, here are some more things to love about Barrie:

1. The total and utter lack of class. Where else but the deepest backwoods, would you be able to go into a town and see people go to the store in their pajamas and socks, or even just barefoot. Yes, that's right, no shoes. I've actually witnessed this several times. People will remove shoes as they cross a parking lot before going into a store. In some cultures, mainly all over Asia, people will remove their shoes before entering a dwelling. It seems Barrie folk are misguided about that concept and replicate it for stores. Perhaps it is a bizarre Barrie ritual for the initiated few hardcore Barrians.
   
   
2. A cultural Sahara of sorts. Now, my knowledge of deserts is limited and admittedly I've never been in the Sahara. That said, the hallmark of a desert is its lack of stuff. When one considers culture at any level, Barrie has that significant lack of it. There are no live shows, theatre plays, musical events. No bar bands, although entertaining, are not always what you crave for. A nice play, a symphony of the more classical type would be cool once in a while, if I had the choice. How about some foreign films to purge out the formulaic-factory-made Hollywood shite we are usually subjected to and that could give the average Barrieite a window on the world. I guess for our Barrie cookie-cutter-house dweller it is good enough. He don't need none of that culture stuff to go with his 24 of Canadian. Sadly instead, one needs to either go to Toronto, 120 Km south and then back or 45mins away to Orillia for a show at Casino Rama. Yes, they actually have all sorts of live acts worth the drive. Barrie, having a larger population base, does not.
   
   
3. Festivals. Yes, in many a place street festivals happen. Amazingly, Barrie has never seen one. There are no artists that take over the streets and dazzle us with their talents. Montreal, Quebec, Edinburgh Scotland, Angers France... to only name a few places who all boast excellent street festivals.
   
   
4. Promenade days and Kempenfest don't count. The first involves the local Barrie drinking holes putting out patio furniture in a now-pedestrian street. Wow. Bars that have a patio. Very novel and different for here or if you've never set foot anywhere in the world. In Barrie, it's so cool and outrageous we needed to give that concept a name: Promenade days. In the rest of the world, it's just a bar with a patio. Kempenfest is a crafts show. The same crafts, every year. The same booths at exactly the same location, selling the same stuff. It's like that movie Groundhog Day. You just keep on reliving the same thing over and over and over again. The only difference is that you're no wiser for having relived it because there is no lesson to be learned. Perhaps the only thing that does sink in after a while, is how much Barrie sucks!
   
   
5. Notorious for all the wrong reasons. Yes, our internationally famed and nationally respected David Suzuki speaks of Barrie. In his report on urban sprawl, he cites Barrie's example as what "NOT TO DO" when it comes to unchecked urban sprawl. Yes, the $ is mighty here. It really got a lot of flex during the recession in the early 90's. If you still had cash, then you could get away with anything in terms of development. And so a trend was born. Over the next 15 years promoters would be developing the most hideous neighborhoods regardless of ecological impact and sustainability, not to mention zero planned infrastructure. This would become the home of many commuters. Cheaper than Toronto, they turned Barrie into a motel or a dorm room. Hey, they just crash here, they don't really care about the place that much. And that's why Barrie doesn't advance or progress.
   
   
6. 15 years after the recession and nothing new. The recession was particularly bad for Barrie most of its industry packed up and went to Toronto or further South to Mexico, thanks to a free-trade deal of sorts back then. Since then, however, one might imagine our city would have strived to attract businesses and industry back by
   bending over backwards. Hell no! there's been no recovery here! We still have no industry to speak of. The jobs are dismally blue collar and minimum wage, but I'm sure you've heard that before. We do have plenty of fast foods to work at though! So what does our city council discuss? Well, one of the main issues that's I've seen come back to bless our local headlines : What should the fine be if your neighbor's cat craps in your yard? But I'm just a simpleton, what do I know about real issues?
   
   
7. Develop what? De-ve-lop-ment. Not just a fancy word for some parts of the world, we could use some of that here too. Now, just a quick geography lesson: Barrie is North of Toronto, South of Sudbury and North Bay, and has countless smaller communities around it like Newmarket, Bradford, Alliston, Orillia, Collingwood, Penetang etc... We have 1 college and no university. In fact, you can either go to Lakehead or Laurentian, way North, or to U of T or York, way South. Is it not time the "fastest-growing city" in Canada did something to implant a university in Barrie? We have a hefty population base for it and neighboring towns that would appreciate it too? So why is no one trying to get an institution of higher learning here? With universities comes research, usually subsidized by close-by businesses. I guess we just don't want to start that kind of chain reaction. Learning, developing, work, what next? Yes, let's just leave that to a town like Bradford who's actively looking at bringing in a university to its neighborhood. As for those who think Georgian college is already "working with a university", here's a little secret: all the colleges pretty much do that these days.
   
   
8. Infrastructure? What for? Well for the thousands of poor sobs that commute daily to real and better paying jobs AWAY from Barrie. Bringing back the GO Train. Wow, this has been like pulling teeth! You'd think we needed to import a large ethnic population from some economically-depressed part of the globe to make it happen. But no, we still can't do it eventhough the tracks are in place! Yes, that's right our city hall/council/pompous useless people who get paid the big buck can't even get a service to COME BACK to town.
   
   
9. A reputation we just can't live down. A look of pity and a lack of comprehension.
   Time and time again, I have seen, heard and felt the attitude from other people as soon as you mention you live in Barrie. Not a pretty or positive experience. They question why Barrie? What's there for you? Immediately followed by "You own a house there don't you?" Well, think about it! That's the only reason why people live here. Otherwise, it's considered like the "Trailer-Park-Boys-Area" and frankly, I consider it : the Armpit of Ontario.
   
   
10. Discrimination. Last but not least, I've recently experienced something novel: regional discrimination. Despite the thousands of Barrieites who try to earn a buck in Toronto and put on their best game face to go to work in the GTA everyday, it seems we Barrie dwellers still need to prove ourselves to the Toronto folks. Looking for that job in the GTA with a Barrie address on a resume can be detrimental to your best efforts. For 6 months I had absolutely no luck. Then, 2007 rolled around and I took on the resolution to put a fake Toronto address on the old resume. My phone started ringing the following day. From the 5 resumes I had time to send, I got 4 interviews, and 2 job offers within 15 days. Coincidence, I think not.

So there you have it Peter, my view on why Barrie sucks badly. Take it, read it, do whatever you want with my little rant, which by the way was very satisfying!

Take care for now.

Bitter in Barrie